Self care

 I went for a walk today. 

Every session, my therapist asks me, "Did you get to any self care since I last saw you?"

"Wellll."

Yesterday I went to my endocrinologist. I have Graves Disease, have I mentioned that? It means that I have an autoimmune condition that makes my thyroid VERY CONFUSED and so it spits out too much thyroid hormones all the time unless I take medication. If I'm high, it can make me jittery and anxious and can also give me a lot of extra energy and productivity. And make me lose weight.

"Your thyroid is a little high."

WHAT THE HECK BODY? WHERE HAVE MY BENEFITS BEEN? I've spent the past month barely able to get off the couch.

Thanks for nothing, thyroid.

Anyway.

I went to my endocrinologist yesterday and he said my thyroid was high, and he increased my medication but he also asked my how my stress was.

Hahahahaha.

So today seemed like a good day to Do The Self Care.

I went on my group chat of local mom friends and said "Does anyone want to go for a walk to ignore our meaningless lives for a while. I mean, my life is meaningless. I'm not saying your lives are meaningless. I'm just. I'm gonna go."

And I laced up my shoes and went for a walk with my own self, Glennon in my ears, the (okay I didn't know it would be THIS strong) wind in my hair.

45 minutes later I thought to myself, Self, that was a good walk. I walked a lot of the demons out and I feel better and now I sure am spent.

I was about a mile away from home.

20 minutes after that, I stumbled through my front door, plugged in my now dead phone, and rooted around my room until I finally found a marble notebook because if we're doing this, we're doing it.  Coffee in hand I plopped on the couch, flipped the notebook to the front cover,

And it had biggest girl's name on the front. Son of a.

Back up to my room I practically crawled, dug around some more, and found another notebook. I grabbed it and the pen next to it and sat down on my bed, my hand moving across the page in a was it somehow apparently did still know how to do.

And then I went downstairs to get another pen because the one I'd been trying to use was completely dead .

How's self care going for you, friend?