Friday, March 23, 2012

I want to talk about how I don't want to talk about it

I'm sad today.

And I don't want to talk about it.


Well that makes this an awfully strange blog post doesn't it.

People I admire talk about writing dangerously. About writing for yourself. About putting yourself out there and writing the truth, raw as it is.

But I don't wanna.

People tell me I'm wise. They praise me for being self aware. They ask me how I always know the right thing to say.

And I always think, well the answer to that is stupidly simple. I just don't say anything at all until I know.

Do you want to know how I compose a blog post? I walk around my house talking to myself about it. I go over and over it in my head until the words sound right. Until I hear the point. Until I get what it is I really want to say.

Well, maybe not *this* post.

My writing isn't raw. It's cooked. It's burnt to a crisp in fact.

And I don't want to apologize for that. I don't want to write just for me. I want my writing to have a message, to have a purpose, to do something for other people. And I think that's a good thing.

But sometimes maybe I sound like I'm more finished than I am. Like I'm at the end of it all looking back. Like everything makes sense to me.

Like I don't need a hug.

And I do. I so do.


  1. Hugs momma. Totally understand. Super duper hugs

  2. Sending hugs your way--and appreciation for your "raw" post. You're talking about something that we all face. Sometimes, we just want to be "better," and not have to slog through all this hard stuff. Thanks for saying it so well.

  3. I completely understand. Well said, well done. Sending a hug your way.

  4. burnt to a crisp. I get that. Boy do I ever. Your writing is beautiful, no matter how it feels to you. And I agree with Ann above--sometimes we want to be better and not slog through the hard every damn day... Thanks for looking out for me. I can't tell you how much it means!

  5. Well you have my hug.
    You have to write for you and always keep that in your mind. You don't always have to convey a message. This is like your sounding board to write whatever is on you mind. Sometimes we just need a space to let thoughts and feelings flow. No rhymes needed.